You are not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

We have enough youth. How about a fountain of "smart"?

When you work here, you can name your own salary.
I named mine, "Skinny".

Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface

A fool and his money can throw one hell of a party.

When blondes have more fun do they know it?

Five days a week my body is a temple.
The other two it's an amusement park.

LEARN FROM YOUR PARENTS' MISTAKES
USE BIRTH CONTROL

Money isn't everything.
But it keeps the kids in touch.

Don't Drink and Drive
You might hit a bump and spill something.

If at first you don't succeed, your skydiving is over.

Reality is only an illusion caused by a deficiency of alcohol.

Time's fun when you're having flies.
......Kermit the Frog

We are born naked, wet and hungry.
Then things get worse.

Red meat is not bad for you
Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.

Ninety-nine percent of all lawyers give the rest a bad name.

Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge to produce reproductive organs.

ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE IS NO MATCH FOR NATURAL STUPIDITY.

GUN CONTROL: using both hands

The more I learn about terrorism,
the more I understand the bill collector.

The latest survey shows that three out of four people make
up 75% of the population